Beans Stinkwater is the alter ego of Gerald Fitzgerald, given to him by Karen Crawford as his new witness protection identity. Beans is portrayed, when Fitz masquerades in whiteface, wears a blond wig and a pink boa, talking in a high-pitched white guy voice, and dances around in circles, singing "Buffalo Gals". He works as a prop comic and a part-time officer at Paradise Police Department. He first appeared in "Top Cops". He is voiced by Cedric Yarbrough.
Biography[]
In "Top Cops", Karen placed Fitz in witness protection, after hearing that a ton of mutants were out to kill him. Fitz was not happy to see that his new identity was a white guy but had no other choice. Fitz went in disguise as Beans Stinkwater and starting working at Paradise PD, after Karen enrolled him there. Every time Beans entered a room, he had to sing his signature folk song, "Buffalo Gals" and dance around, throwing confetti, which Fitz found exhausting but had to keep up with, nonetheless. Randall soon took a liking to Beans and loved everything about him.
Randall ordered Beans to go down to The Mutant Ghetto in disguise as Fitz to sort things out with the mutants. Beans went to Karen in disguise as Fitz and told her what Randall ordered her to do and Karen sent him back to Paradise PD to talk Randall out of it in disguise as herself to talk Randall out of it, since she was too busy with the Rebuild Paradise Initiative. Beans came back with a Karen disguise and talked Randall out of it and Randall decided he'd go down to the Mutant Ghetto himself but was too busy, so he had Karen go in disguise as himself to do it, slapping yet another disguise on top of Fitz.
Fitz went in disguise as Beans, in disguise as Fitz, in disguise as Karen, in disguise as Randall, down to the Mutant Ghetto and saw how horribly the mutants were being treated over there. Fitz dejectedly removed each one of his disguises to reveal his true identity as Gerald Fitzgerald and ask the Mutants for forgiveness, but decides to stay as Beans Stinkwater because they still want him dead. Believing him briefly passing as Fitzgerald to be a hilarious joke, they laugh it off with Beans, to their delight.
In "What Happens in Twatemala", kept up the ruse by setting up a website for Beans Stinkwater called "BookBeansStinkwaterHesNotFitz.com", where people could go to book him at events, what with him being a prop comic and all. Randall remembered just how much he loved Beans and hired him to perform at The Twatnugget Casino. Fitz was initially opposed to doing this job but Karen told him that the money would be going to fund the rebuild paradise initiative and then Fitz felt obligated to do it. Fitz saw that the casino was selling tons of merchandise of Beans Stinkwater, from t-shirts, to hats, to balloons, to drinking cups and hundreds of people were excited to see him.
In "PARAD-ISIS", there was a poster on the wall of 24 Hour Drive Up Weddings, advertising Beans Stinkwater.
Appearance[]
Beans Stinkwater is a light-skinned Caucasian adult male with a big, shiny, blonde quiff hairstyle and matching handlebar mustache. Aside from his uniform Paradise PD police attire, he wears a dark gray undershirt, and a bright pink feather boa.
Personality[]
Beans Stinkwater is a whiteface minstrel performer, who acts like a cross between a stereotypical Caucasoid and a flamboyant homosexual. He is very exuberant and energetic, having a very loud and bubbly demeanor that gives him a significant stage presence. Every time Beans enters a room, he dances around like an idiot, throws out a bucket of confetti, and sings "Buffalo Gals". Beans is also a real comedian, who loves telling jokes of all kinds. One of his favorite forms of comedy, which he learned from the best, is "prop comedy" and Beans is a master of this art, having a slew of several clever and witty puns and gags up his sleeve.
Episode Appearances[]
- Top Cops
- What Happens in Twatemala
- PARAD-ISIS (Name Printed)
Trivia[]
- Beans is a parody of late-comedian, Rip Taylor due to sharing each other's physical appearance, flamboyant personality, voice, habit of throwing confetti, and use of prop comedy.
- The last name "Stinkwater" could be a reference to a Dornish castle from Game of Thrones.
- One of Bean's slogans is "Beans, The Musical Fruit", which, on top of being a play on a classic playground song, could suggest that he's a homosexual. This is supported by Beans' flamboyant behavior, effeminate voice, and pink feather boa.
- This is also supported by the fact that he's a parody on bisexual comedian, Rip Taylor.
Gallery[]
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