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Trigger Warnings
Season 3, Episode 4, Overall 22
Trigger Warnings.png
Written by Josh Lehrman & Kyle Stegina
Directed by Mike Disa
First Aired: March 12, 2021
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Trigger Warnings is the fourth episode of Season 3 of Paradise PD. It is the twenty-second episode, overall.

Synopsis

Kevin and Karen try to improve gun safety in Paradise, while Randall contradicts them entirely and tries to loosen them. Meanwhile, Fitz tries to spice things up in the bedroom with his wife.

Plot

Randall drives in the car with Kevin and is still guilt-tripping him for drinking his jizz in the previous episode, not wanting him to forget that. Just then, they get a distress call, altering them to the birthday party of Robby's Nephew, where there's supposedly a gun situation taking place. When Kevin and Randall get there, Robby gives them the status, which is just that his nephew doesn't have a gun to shoot his piñata with. Kevin realizes the absurdity of Robby requiring firearms to break piñatas but Randall understands completely and gives the blindfolded little boy a gun to shoot open the piñata. The boy shoots the piñata and a bunch of other guns fall out. All of which go off, killing everybody except the important characters instantly.

Dusty comes into Paradise PD with a bunch of costumes that used to belong to his cats. He gives them to Bullet and tells him to put them on and record cute videos for his YouTube channel but Bullet refuses, believing this to be humiliating and demeaning. The he dresses like a German girl and smacks a German businessman in the ass with a bratwurst. Dusty begs Bullet to help him improve his channel, as all he's making now is reaction videos, (which he thinks means eating food he's allergic to like shrimp and having a "reaction" to it). His only subscriber is his mom, who's always spamming him in the comments with insults and demands for him to kill himself.

Fitz tells Hopson that he's having some trouble pleasing Dolphin Queen in bed. Even after role-playing as a dolphin and a Japanese fisherman, (with Fitz being the dolphin for some reason), the spark seems to be missing. Hopson suggests he uses a dolphin dildo called the Cloaca Quaker but Fitz already tried that too to no avail. Hopson decides that the best option would be for him to hire a friend of his to come down and spice things up for both of them with a three way. Fitz is initially opposed, not wanting to have sex with a wrinkly old lady but Hopson says that she's nothing of the sort. She's young, sexy, flexible, and lacking a 10-inch Latino penis, hence why he's never had sex with her, which gets Fitz to accept. Hopson also requires Fitz's assistance getting his testicles out of the toilet.

Randall comes in and nearly trips over Hopson's stretched out scrotum. He's approached by Kevin and Karen, who heard all about the gun incident at Robby's nephew's birthday from the former. Karen believes there's a gun problem in Paradise and opts to enforce stricter gun laws on the town but Randall completely disagrees, saying that the more guns there are, the safer the people are. However, Karen says that he's only saying this because he's a member of the NRA. Kevin bickers with Randall and says that the town needs sensible gun control but Gina comes in and chides him for his libtard palaver about gun control. She brings up how mayonnaise kills people too but taking away all the mayo is a stupid idea. Kevin believes that taking away mayonnaise from people who use it irresponsibly, such as Dusty, is actually a good idea. Dusty is then shown with a mayonnaise jar stuck on his head. Karen acknowledges how senseless acts of gun violence happen in Paradise every day and they never do anything about it but Randall says that he tweeted "thoughts and prayers" on the shooting at Robby's nephew's birthday, which brings Gina to republican tears. Randall says that before Karen enforces gun laws on Paradise, turning it into Communist Canada, he wants to give her a tour of the NRA to show her just how nice guns really are but first, Kevin shows him a Michael Moore video, where he has rips off Dusty's "reaction" video and gets more views.

Bullet skims through the evidence lockers to see what kind of drug he should get high on this time. After turning down marijuana and heroin, Bullet comes across a fancy new drink called Blowquila, which is apparently coke-laced tequila that you can snort to get drunk and high. In it, sits a Blowquila Worm that is zonked of if its wits. Bullet snorts some and goes stark raving mad. Bullet rummages out of the locker and stumbles into the box of costumes, landing himself in a bunny suit. Bullet dances around and sings about how he's a bunny dog and this all gets caught on the police department's security camera. Dusty takes this footage and uploads it on YouTube. When Bullet wakes up from his hangover and sees what Dusty did, he gets pissed off at him and then leaves to flush Hopson's testicles down the toilet.

At the NRA, Randall shows Kevin, Gina, and Karen just how amazing this corporation really is. Randall gets to meet NRA mascot, Bumpy the Bump Stop ans Gina plays in the gun pit, where she finds a dead kid. Randall even finds the corpse of Charleton Heston, which is grasping a shotgun in his cold dead hands. There's a contest, saying that if one pries the gun from his cold dead hands, they'll win a Republican senate seat. After some goofing around from Randall and Gina, Kevin and Karen are greeted by NRA leader, Chip Fuckyeah, who wants to convince them that guns aren't the problem. They're the solution. He shows them an alternate-history movie called Guns Make a Better World, which envisions a world where Jesus had guns. In the film, Jesus fights back against the Romans at Golgotha with machine guns and kills them before having sex with two hot Jewish ladies. Kevin doesn't like this video and tells Mr. Fuckyeah that a better idea to solve gun violence would be to use something like smart guns. Fuckyeah actually says that the NRA has been working on something just like this and introduces him to Smart Guns, anthropomorphic guns with minds of their own and making it mandatory for people to own these. The first smart gun to appear is a jolly young chap named Mr. Bang Bang, who Karen is quick to hate. Chip Fuckyeah bribes her with a briefcase full of Russian money, Karen completely backtracks on what she just said and announces that smart guns will now be given to everyone in Paradise.

Randall dances around town, happily singing "Everyone Gets a Gun" and tossing out smart guns to all kinds of horrible people who shouldn't be owning guns, such as gangs, schizoids, blind people, prisoners, Chris Brown, children, unborn fetuses, cults, militias, and Satan himself.

Mr. Bang Bang is assigned to Kevin and follows him everywhere he goes, driving the latter crazy. When Kevin walks into Paradise PD, he sees that all of the other cops (sans Bullet and Fitz) have been assigned smart guns of their own, to match their personalities. Hopson has a perverted old man gun who was actually the same gun John Wilkes Booth used to kill Abraham Lincoln. They both have a lot in common, since Hopson and his gun both unloaded into old Honest Abe. Gina's Smart Gun is a violent girl gun just like her, who also possesses miniature firearms of her own. These miniature guns aren’t smart guns, so it’s unknown why she was allowed to use them. Dusty doesn’t see the resemblance between himself and his smart gun who is a big fat cannon who eats tons of ammo. Last but not least, Radall’s smart gun is a cool 80’s style movie hero named Jean-Claude Van Blam with a bunch of cool catchphrases. Randall admires how all these guns automatically attack whatever they see as a threat. Fitz comes in and all the guns immediately point at him, scaring him back off again.

Bullet scrounges around the evidence locker, in search of his Blowquila but can’t find it. Dusty suddenly shows up with his Blowquila and his bunny suit, telling him that he can’t any more drugs unless he makes another bunny dog video. Bullet gives in and sings the viral YouTube song, “I'm a Bunny Dog”, which blasts Dusty’s video to internet fame.

At Laousi Apartments, Mr. Bang Bang watches Kevin while he pees and then sneezes, nearly shooting his dick off. Just then, a couple of Jehovah's Witnesses come to the door and ask Kevin for a few minutes of his time but Kevin declines, as he’s Jewish this season but the evangelists’ smart gun comes up and threatens him to convert and tries to shoot his head off. Kevin slams the door on them and Mr. Bang Bang can’t believe his eyes. He can’t seem to wrap his head around the fact that a gun would do evil. Kevin educates Mr. Bang Bang in gun violence and shows him a myriad of websites and news articles that exhibit various instances of gun violence in recent history such as school shootings and murders in the streets that were caused by lack of proper gun control.

Bullet tells Dusty that now that he did his stupid bunny dog video for him, he wants out of the bunny costume. Dusty cruelly rips his costume's zipper off so he'll be stuck in it forever. Bullet rants and rages at him for being stuck in this costume forever and Dusty tells him that he'll get over it eventually. Three years ago, he ripped the zipper of his pants by mistake and never got them off. Bullet thinks that this means Dusty has been wearing the same pair of pants for three years but Dusty tells him that what actually happened is that his pants were on for so long that his skin naturally absorbed them like how a tree grows around a fence. This, as described by Dusty's doctor is a disease known as "hungry skin". Since then, Dusty has pants inside his body and now paints his clothes on, explaining why his pants come with an asshole. Bullet can expect the same thing to happen with his bunny suit.

Randall drives with Jean-Claude Van Blamme and writes a few new catchphrases for him that he doesn’t share the hype for. Just then, they come across Kevin and Mr. Bang Bang staging a protest against smart gun violence. A bunch of other smart guns agree to stop being violent and they all shit out their magazines. Randall doesn't like what he sees and tells Jean-Claude to shoot them all but Jean-Claude says he agrees with the retired smart guns and shits out all of his ammo too to join them in their new lifestyle of non-violence.

At Fitz's Apartment, Fitz prepares for his three way sex date with Dolphin Queen and this new friend of Hopson's. When this new girl comes in, she turns out to be an octopus, which he is disgusted by but realizes it makes sense and has no other choice, when spicing things up with his wife. Fitz and DQ have sex with the octopus girl getting in on the action and there's even a part when the octopus crawls up Fitz's asshole.

At the NRA, Randall announces how Mr. Bang Bang has just organized a team of anti-gun guns and how they're against them. This confuses NRA member, Gary, who doesn't understand what this is all about. Chip Fuckyeah explains that they are anti-anti-gun guns, which only raises more questions that go unanswered because Chip asks Gary to put his goddamned hand down. The NRA think of idea on how to control gun violence with tons of ideas that actually mirror actual arguments for gun control. Randall proposes that they establish a 30-day waiting period for the smart guns so that they can calm down before they can shoot their mouths off and Chip suggests they ban AR-15s outright. Gina reminds the NRA of the second amendment but Randall tells Gina that these smart guns are futuristic weapons that their founding fathers could have never foreseen, making the second amendment completely irrelevant. The NRA makes it their plan to take away Kevin's guns before his guns can take away everyone else's guns.

Kevin drives off with all of the smart guns, to take them to the Paradise Airport and send them off on their world tour, when Randall, Gina, and some NRA members drive up next to him and demand he get rid of his guns. Kevin refuses and so Randall takes out the last remaining normal gun to shoot him. This being a rifle held by the corpse of Charleton Heston. The corpse is still grabbing onto the gun before a car passes by and smashes the corpse off, leaving only his zombified hand, still gripping onto the gun. This only makes it easier for Randall to shoot Kevin and his guns but Kevin still manages to escape.

After the sex of over, Dolphin Queen is very pleased, while Fitz is deeply disturbed and dripping with ink jizz. Just then, the apartment is visited by a sexy girl, who confirms that she's Hopson's friend, coming over for her three way. They're also visited by two guys working at the Paradise Aquarium named Jim and Jay, who say that their octopus went missing. Fitz realizes his reasonable but embarrassing mistake and gets berated by the angry aquarium guys for fucking their octopus.

Bullet sneaks into Dusty's Apartment, while he's sleeping to drink the rest of the blowquila to stop all the videos. When he wakes up after OD-ing, Dusty is standing there with the blowquila worm, telling him that he's gunna use the worm to make one more video with him and his new friend, Bunny Pig, (who is apparently, Lena Dunham). However, the blowquila worm beats the shit out of Dusty by biting his finger and bodyslamming him back and forth until he gets knocked out. Bullet thanks the blowquila worm by eating him dead.

Kevin and the smart guns make it to the Paradise Airport, where they have trouble passing the metal detector. The security guard there doesn't understand why and just assumes it's because Mr. Bang Bang is wearing a belt. The cops and the NRA finally come in and stop Kevin at the gate, telling him not to send those guns on the world tour. Kevin asks for just one reason why they need guns and Randall admits that the only reason the NRA needs guns is because they all have inadequate genitals. In Randall's case, he had his testicles shot off his body and in the cases of such other NRA members as Chip and Gary, they don't even have balls at all. They demonstrate this by pulling down their pants to show their Ken Doll situations, just as Petey comes by and gets horrifically exposed to them, getting scarred for life once again. Kevin tells Randall that he's not trying to have his guns taken away. He's just trying to establish some stricter rules on gun control, such as not giving guns to crazy people and doing stricter background checks. Randall is finally convinced but Chip Fuckyeah is not. He completely snaps and takes out a confiscated regular gun and shoots all of the smart guns to death in cold blood before passing out.

On the news, Anderson Cooper reports on the horrible atrocity that took place at the Paradise Airport and announces that because of this, Paradise has established an all new Anti-Anti-Anti-Gun-Gun-Gun law to ensure this doesn't happen again. Meanwhile, in Heaven, Jesus Christ sits with the now deceased smart guns and reads that Randall tweeted "Thoughts and Prayers" on the shooting at the airport but because it only got 3 likes as opposed to his desired 10, Jesus chooses to withhold his abilities to prevent tragedies and let the next shooting just happen on his watch.

Characters

Major Roles

Minor Roles

Songs

Trivia

  • Robby has a nephew.
  • Dusty has a YouTube account, where he eats food that he's allergic to.
  • Dusty is deathly allergic to shrimp.
  • Kevin and Karen are pro-gun control. In contrast, Randall and Gina are proud members of the NRA.
  • Three years ago, Dusty broke the zipper off his pants and couldn't get them off and his skin absorbed his pants and sucked them into his body. Dr. Funtlichter diagnosed him with "hungry skin"; a skin condition where skin absorbs anything it touches.
    • Since this incident, Dusty doesn't wear clothes anymore and just paints his outfits on.
  • Ever since the shooting of his testicles, Randall needs guns to get an erection.
  • America passes an "Anti Anti Anti Gun Gun Gun Bill", which takes America from an enormous 400,000,000 to a barely noticeable 390,000,000 guns, only subtracting 1,000,000 guns from the picture.

Continuity

Cultural References

  • The title is a reference to the initially feminist-related term, "trigger warnings", which is a disclaimer put before works that involve sensitive subjects, such as rape, domestic abuse, self-harm, suicide, etc.
  • This episode satirizes the long-debated controversy about gun violence and gun control in America. Such characters as Randall, Gina, and Chip Fuckyeah are strawmen, who exhibit common right-wing fallacies that suggest guns are safe and do more good than harm and should be easily accessible to all people. Kevin represents a left-leaning voice of reason who believes that while banning guns is only going to make gun violence worse, they should still enforce stricter gun control laws such as mandating extensive background checks on gun buyers and not selling guns to the notoriously criminal or mentally ill.
    • This episode also toys with the currently scientifically fictional concept of smart guns, which are firearms that function similar to smart phones, in that they can only be activated via fingerprint recognition or voice identification, whereas to only allow the rightful owners to use the guns and prevent any criminals who steal or bum these guns to use them.
  • Dusty has a Pinky Pie costume in his box of animal costumes.
  • Bullet insults Cobra Kai twice.
  • Bullet makes fun of "The Hangover: Part II".
  • The corpse of Charleton Heston appears with a message challenging people to pry his gun "from his cold dead hands". This is a reference to his famous quote, which he made in 2000, in response to the then-popular campaigns to outlaw guns due to the 1999 Columbine shooting.
  • The NRA shows a parody of The Passion of the Christ, where Jesus has guns and fights back against the Romans who tried to crucify him.
  • Dusty insults Lena Dunham twice.
  • Randall thinks it's a good idea to give Chris Brown a gun. This is a reference to the fact that he's physically abused his girlfriend, Rhianna in the past.
    • Chris Brown was also shown with a restraining order, which references to the restraining order issued against him in 2018, by a woman known only as "Cassandra", who kept getting sexually harassed and physically abused by him at a party.
  • Randall's song brings up how in the 1787, the U.S. Constitution was created, which included the second amendment, this being the right to bear arms.
  • Kevin got an erotic novel autographed by The Hamburglar.
  • Hopson had a sexual past with Abraham Lincoln.
  • Jean-Claude Van Blam is a parody on Jean-Claude Van Damme.
  • I'm a Bunny Dog is a parody on the viral internet video from the late 00's, I'm a Gummy Bear.
  • Gerald Fitzgerald quotes famous French explorer, Jacques Cousteau, by saying, "I'm about to fuck a dolphin." Jacques Cousteau never actually said this.
  • Gerald Fitzgerald exclaims "I can't breathe!" several times, during his sex with the Dolphin Queen and the Octopus. This is quote on the Black Lives Matter slogan, popularized by George Floyd, when he died of drug withdraw on May 25th, 2020, while his neck was being knelt on by Derek Chauvin.
  • Dusty is about to insult Lena Dunham a second time, by mentioning her HBO show, Girls before Bullet stops him, being fed up with him making such off-color low blows.
  • Anderson Cooper reports on the shooting at the Paradise Airport on CNN.

See Also

Episodes

Season 1


Welcome to ParadiseAss on the LineBlack & BlueKarlaDungeons & DragnetMeet the JabowskisPolice AcademyTask ForceParent TrapChristmas in Paradise


Season 2


Paradise FoundBig Ball EnergyTucker Carlson is a Huge D**kWho Ate Wally's Waffles?The Father, The Son, and The Post-It NoteFlip the VoteParadise PD Meets BrickleberryOperation DD


Season 3


FalloutTop CopsIce Ice BabiesTrigger WarningsShowdown at the O-bese CorralHow the Cookie CrumblesBlind DrunkBlimp CityThe World According to LARPFetal AttractionWhat Happens in TwatemalaPARAD-ISIS

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